Salute Your Saint

For the past 2 years my boss has been toying with the idea of an All Saints Day party rather than a Halloween party for our students. We narrowly escaped that fate this year. Seriously though, what would you do for such an event? A feast, as is the intent of the day? A day of no school? Okay, not likely for us, but I still remember how the Catholic school punks got the day off of school. Oh, the perceived injustices of childhood!

Happy Halloween!

One down, one to go. I just survived my 4th Halloween in Taiwan. My school had it's party this evening and I have one more party to assist at tomorrow night and then the hubbub will be over for another year. This holiday has been evolving in Taiwan over the past few years, and sadly, I think it's reached the point where it's a much bigger deal than Christmas at a lot of schools. The selection and availability of Halloween paraphernalia seems to increase steadily from year to year, though I was still only able to find one store carrying pumpkins. Above is my creation, carved with a very basic design because it was part of a story illustration for this evening's party.

Halloween parties have come to be expected at English schools, and for the past 2 years, we've aimed to approach the event as a ministry opportunity. Last year we did it with Veggie Tales and the theme: Where's God When I'm Scared? This year's theme was: The Good Farmer. Last week we had a staff meeting that went something like this:

Boss: As you know, next week's Halloween and we'll be having a party. For the main feature, Kara will be telling a story about a pumpkin that presents the Gospel in a very clear manner. Why don't you tell us a bit about it now?

Me: Umm, do I know this Kara? I mean, okay, well . . .

You see, I mentioned in passing that I was going to do a pumpkin story for this week's Bible class, which would be tomorrow night, but that was somehow interpreted as me volunteering to do it for the entire school tonight. I didn't mind though, it was a great opportunity, it's just that it's always bit awkward being informed that you're going to be doing something the same time everyone else finds out.

So yes, the evening started with me relating a story about carving a pumpkin to God and mankind: God helps us grow, God chooses us, God can change us within, from the inward change comes an outward one, and the light placed within us. It ended with teaching This Little Light of Mine, a song most of my Bible class students already know. It might sound cheesy, but a room of 80+ kids singing it was pretty cool. Afterwards, it was onto an evening of games, activities, and of course, candy.

Be still my heart

It's a Friday night. Another week of work is complete and I'm ready to unwind, only I can't. My heart is still racing from my mass consumption of caffiene today. Ugh.

I enjoy both coffee and tea, but for the most part, avoid them. I get hooked on caffiene way too easy and I hate the side effects. For whatever reason, I've felt drained this week and needed a boost to get me through the day, so I had a small pot of coffee with lunch. Mistake. By my afternoon classes, I was shaking and for the rest of the day, I've felt my heart racing. Great.

Tonight with my dinner, I decided to order an Ovaltine. Again, mistake. Somewhere along the line, there was confusion and instead, I recieved a giant cup of coffee! When it arrived, I happened to be in class, parched, while my water bottle was in another room, so what did I do - I drank some of the coffee. Not all, probably not even half, but any amount was more than what I needed. There came a point where I felt as though I was going to cause my own death if I consumed anymore. I can see it now - joe delivered the final blow. Here's to hoping rest comes despite my mistakes.

On a side note - the coffee I brewed this afternoon was fantastic! A friend bought it at a night market over a year ago, gave it to me when she moved, and it's been in my freezer ever since. Though she assured me it was good, I was skeptical - perhaps one of the reasons it's been in my freezer so long. However, it's quite delish. Night market coffee - who knew!

Best left unsaid

Being that I speak very little Mandarin and read even less, I really do appreciate restaurants that use photos on their menus, or better yet, incorporate English. However, there are the occasional translations that should be forgone. Case in point, driving past an area restaurant this week, a friend and I were amused to discover a new banner stating "Mandarin Duck Chaffing Dish."

Children can also have an interesting way with words. Tonight a young student shared that his uncle died this week. The uncle had jumped from his (the uncle's) 9th floor balcony, to which a classmate quickly added, "and now he's in hell." Woah! I think I'm the only one who understood what the classmate said and was slightly amused/intrigued that he was so quick-witted in his sarcasm and frankly, bold enough to make such a remark, much less know how to say it in English. However, in retrospect, I'm a bit shocked. In this predominately Buddhist country, that's not a typical comment an adult, much less a child, would say, whether in English or Chinese. I was beginning to think that maybe I've just not heard it here because people express it in Chinese, but I asked around and even the Taiwanese people I checked with were surprised. Hmm.

Strike a Pose

Sarah strikes a pose, originally uploaded by redjett.

After a whirlwind 9 days of traveling Taiwan and visiting with a dear friend, routine took over today. Things got started Friday (10/6) in Taipei where we spent a few days sight seeing, visiting with my Taiwanese big sis, sampling local cuisine (mmm, fresh squid and octopus), and relaxing at the hotel catching up on movies and learning to immitate the Taiwanese commercials (la,la,la so happy!). I somehow acquired a reputation as one who eats beside a trash can, but it was sheer coincidence or necessity. Come on, would you really want to walk through crowds at a night market while trying to de-gut your squid? I also had to break into some good old fashioned jumping on the bed while at the hotel - ahh, nice beds and high ceilings. Hanging out with a friend from my youth must bring out the kid in me.

On Monday (10/9), it was an island hop for a day and a night to take in a bit of snorkeling, beachcombing, and exploring tide pools by day and chilling seaside under the stars by night - refreshing breezes and lightening bugs - sweet!

From there it was a scooter trip on Tuesday to Meinong, a.k.a. Taiwan's handpainted umbrella capital. There was even time for a tea break to make some famous Meingong tea. We had the shop to ourselves and the servers brought out special costumes and props for an outright photo shoot of the foreigners dressed in Hakka garb. Finally, back home to Kaohsiung to recoup - 7 hours on a scooter in one day is more than enough for me.

Beyond Tuesday I was back to work but the week still held more treats and adventures for my guest. We met up with Becky for most of the remaining activities including Meinong, mtv, hiking on monkey mountain (I opted out of that adventure), the toilet restaurant, tepanyaki, Lotus Lake, and a hair wash.

We departed Kaohsiung Saturday afternoon for the trip to the airport. Sarah flew out late in the evening and 25 hours later, I found myself back at home. I stopped over at a friend's for the night on my trip back for a good night's rest and an overdue visit. It was funny to think that Sarah got home before I did, but sometimes the journey takes precedent over the destination. I spent the rest of Sunday catching up on, umm, sleep, and today, back to work. Sadly the visit came and went in a flash, however, it was nice to once again share my home and life in Taiwan with someone I'm close to. Thanks for coming Grasshopper!

Broken things

a colorful beach
Originally uploaded by redjett.

I'm sure shores were not intended to be this colorful. In fact, the enriched display is the result of litter, yet, on a beach of broken, bleached coral, I've come to fancy the colorful contrast of broken things. I even like to collect a few pieces each visit for some yet unknown future project.
I love how the shards of broken glass become smoothed over by the tide, rough edges polished. While the broken pieces won't become part of the whole again, they can be changed into something new. Though caught up for a time in the turbulence of the sea, beaten by the waves, many pieces still come to bank on the shore. While still susceptible to being swallowed up once more by the sea, there is also the potential for getting pushed farther and farther ashore, away from the temultuous sands and nearer to the weathered rocks.
I love the bits that are "fresh," still wet from the tide and glistening. They're most beautiful when reflecting the sun.

Sometimes I am a broken thing. Much like the glass without eyes, I fail to see the broken things around me. I'm still catching my breath and taking in the warmth of the Son, hoping that despite being tossed and tumbled, a piece of me can still reflect Light.
Like glass, I'm sometimes left feeling transparent, exposed, and vulnerable, at least for a time.
Sometimes the brokenness results in refinement. Other times, some rough edges remain, still waiting to be smoothed out. Even so, each time, the result is change. It's impossible to escape unchanged.

No Soup for You!

While my health wasn't completely restored overnight, I did awake feeling tremendously better this morning. I had just spent the past 2 days with a fever which hung around 102 degrees while I spent 10 hours at work yesterday. I did manage to slip out briefly in the evening for a quick run to the dr and the medicine she prescribed started to help soon after taking it last night.

While I was still presented with a very sore throat and almost no voice today, my energy level was high, just in time to finish cleaning up the place for my friend's rapidly approaching visit. I even felt well enough to make myself some homemade chicken noodle soup since it became apparent that my mom was not coming to make it for me. Thanks mom. Sure, I still had the aforementioned ramen, but mysterious seafood flavored soup just doesn't hold the same appeal as chicken noodle comfort food. But alas, it was not meant to be. There would be no soup for me. While I thought I had everything on hand for my culinary concoction, I was dismayed to discover the chicken had gone bad. By that point, the heart had gone out of the endeavor and I had no desire to go to the store for more meat. However, I think tomorrow I shall delve into a new realm and attempt some lemongrass and clam soup. It can also be quite satisfying when sick.

Ramen to the Rescue

Here's a story from a few weeks back that I've been meaning to share.

It was once again that time of the month - time to pay the rent. The landlady would be arriving shortly for her monthly collection so I made my way to the corner 7-Eleven to use the ATM. After withdrawing the necessary funds, I came to the sober realization that I had an equivalent of $1 US in the bank until my next pay day, still at least 2 weeks away. Wow. Though I had just had my best summer since being in Taiwan, it was probably my worst summer financially. The cutback in hours for the summer schedule in July and August were catching up with me now in early September. Basically, for the next few weeks, I was broke. There was not even money to spare for those little luxuries in life known as food and water (yep, gotta buy drinking water). Now it's true, my cupboards are full of food, but most things require an ingredient I don't have in order to make them.

As I got back to my apartment, I was thinking some more about what it meant to not even have money to spare on food for the next few weeks when the doorbell rang, or chirped, as the case may be. It was the landlady, no surprise. As I handed over the envelope of money, she handed be a paper bag from the grocery store. Inside where two big packs containing 10 regular sized packs of Ramen noodle soup. She found this particular kind to be good and thought I might enjoy it, though no, she's not in the habit of bringing me things. As we said good-bye and I closed the door, I couldn't help but chuckle at the though of how only minutes earlier I was wondering how I was going to afford food and here it was, free food being delivered to my door. Oh, the irony. It reminded me so much of friends' stories about praying for something and God answering their prayer but in a way very different from what they had in mind.

Oh snap! At the same time, what a slap. I hadn't even gone to God about the situation. I was still mulling over it in my own mind. I appreciated the reminder that God cares for us and about us even when we think things too insignificant to bring before Him. What a great reminder of His provision as well as a reminder of the insignificance of things of this world and how often I spend too much time toiling over things I shouldn't. For the second time that evening, I felt stunned.

The following morning, a group of people were at my house for house church. A Taiwanese friend I hadn't seen in a while happened to come and brought a large jug of tea for me. She claimed her father sent it to thank me for a time that I treated her to lunch. It was a thank you for looking out for her. Oh, the object lessons seemed to be coming in abundance that weekend. I was reminded of how God can not only meet our needs but exceed our expectations. It's cool too how God can bless us through those who are Christians, and through those who aren't, like my landlady.

Cynicism with a side of Sarcasm

Bunny. Now there's a word we never seem to teach to kids in Taiwan. Rabbit, they know, but bunny, not a clue. Anyway, that's not the point of this exercise.

One Friday night after a long week of work, I stepped outside the front doors of the school and saw a white rabbit hanging out at the shoe rack. I probably did something like rub my eyes in disbelief or checked to see if someone was hiding nearby carrying out some sort of practical joke, for not more than a few yards away is an area known for park dogs, against which a rabbit would not stand a chance. Though it hopped into one of the cubbyholes of the shoe shelf, it didn't seem to mind my approaching it. Obviously, it had been someone's pet. Apparently that someone decided they no longer wanted it and as people here tend to do with their dogs (even expensive purebreds), the owner dumped it off. After all, it's common knowledge that domesticated rabbits are known for their street smarts and survival skills when abandoned in a city full of street dogs. I'm sure it was no accident that the rabbit was left near a school where surely some child, parent, or in this case, teacher, would take pity and adopt the stray street bunny. The plan worked. After calling out my co-workers to insure that I indeed wasn't seeing things, one decided to take it home, clean it up, and eventually find a new owner for it. We found out later that a few of our students saw a man drop it off outside earlier that day, discarding his once pet.

Last night, another Friday night after another busy week at work, I once again spotted a rabbit in a place where it didn't belong - my building's elevator. This time, however, the rabbit appeared in the form of the Easter Bunny on a newly posted sign. My guess is that the sign is regarding festivities at my complex for the upcoming Moon Festival, but what really caught my eye was the Easter clipart in a lower corner. You can't get much more Easter inspired than a collage with a cross, lilies, colored eggs, and the Easter Bunny. Sure, I suppose that not knowing it's intended use, one might not think it an unusual selection. It probably just seemed like a nice or perhaps even festive general purpose picture. However, I would think it quite obvious to not fit with the Moon Fest theme, but maybe that's just me.

9/28

To my cohorts in Taiwan, Happy Teacher's Day! Though the day has actually been labeled such to commemorate the birthday of Eastern scholar and teacher, Confucius, it's become used to recognize educators island-wide as well. While I didn't take in the morning festivities this year at the city's Confucius temple, it was still a day made a bit sweeter by the well wishes of students. For some reason, many seemed quite excited this year to bestow greetings, cards, and treats. It was such a nice day that it would have made for a great Friday to leave the work week on such a happy note, however, one more day to go. I rarely dread Fridays, but this week, I make an exception. What I hate more than going to the doctor's is going to the doctors in Taiwan, something I've gotta do tomorrow morning. Okay, time to redirect my focus to something more favorable - Sarah arrives in one week!

Cool.

Yesterday I was bestowed with good news not once, but twice. One of my best friends from the U.S. bought her ticket and is coming for a visit and a NZ photo of mine has been included in a newly released Christchurch guide.

Sarah-babey is coming to Taiwan - woo-hoo! Yeah, I'm beaming slightly. A friend from home is coming for a visit and in just 2 weeks - eek! - so much to do, but how exciting! The timing is great. She arrives on Moon Festival Day which means a 3 day weekend for me. Sadly, the day probably won't wind down by eating bbq and wearing pomelo peels on our heads under the full moon, traditions for such a holiday, but it's bound to be an exciting weekend nonetheless. Better still is another built-in day off while she's here, Double 10, Taiwan's national holiday. (Glad we'll be out of Taipei for that one, kid.)

As for the photo, that process began over the summer when I was approached about permission to have a photo considered for an upcoming Christchurch city guide. I had almost forgotten about it until I received word this week that is was accepted for inclusion and appears in the new guide. It's by far not one of my favorite trip photos, however, I guess it happened to be of something they were looking for.

and now... i've seen it all

I thought I had witnessed the most interesting dog-in-traffic senario the time I saw a man stuff his compact canine into his scooter seat, close the lid, and drive off. That one beat out the time it appearred that an English Sheepdog was driving a scooter as it stood on the floor with front paws on the handles while its peitite owner was behind it somewhere buried in a mass of flying fur. However, based on this afternoon's traffic encounter, I've surely seen it all.

In Taiwan, we have a plethera of what we refer to as "blue trucks." They're a small delivery/service/construction/makeshift-food-or-produce-stand type of pick-up truck, invariably painted blue. They have a rep for having careless, accident causing, often betel nut chewing, drivers. Yesterday, one such truck was ahead of me at a red light. Nothing unusal about that, expect perhaps that the truck was stopped at the light instead of trying to barrel through, but I digress. No, the unusual part was that a medium sized dog was sitting on the roof of the truck - not in the bed, but on the roof of the cab. The dog looked around lazily and yawned while the growing pack of scooter riders pointed and stared. As the light changed to green and the truck proceeded onward, what should the dog do but rise to its feet and stand, roof-surfing, as the truck made its way through traffic winding and weaving. True to blue truck driver fashion, the driver made wild illegal turns and sudden breaks. How that dog stayed aloft standing on the roof is beyond me. What a moment to not have a camera.

Instant Success

Ever find yourself wishing you could have instant success?

Well, now you can! Just head on down to your local Taiwanese baking supply store and get yourself a box today.

What must be baking powder, or baking soda, is a box labeled Instant Success. Though I've seen it here for several years, I still crack a smile when I pass it in the aisle.

Why didn't some marketing genius in the US think of this, or perhaps one had? Just think of the possibilities - All you need to make the perfect cake is a pinch of Instant Success. Sounds like something right out of the 1940's or 50's.

Blest Be the Tie

I was reminded of a favorite hymn as I played a cd this evening that was given me over the summer. The cd consists of guitar music performed by a member of my home church - mostly the musician's favorite hymns and some patriotic stuff, but I've been enjoying it greatly nonetheless. When it reached track 10: Blest Be the Tie, I was flooded with memories of singing that tune in church, especially during times when the church or its members were facing hardships. It's amazing now to reflect upon those times and see how things have changed or unfolded since then. What a joy it is to see how God worked through some of those challenges.

The song also brings a touch of comfort. Hearing someone I know, someone I even had weeknight "jam" sessions with on my bass, made home feel not so far away and somehow makes Heaven feel not so far away either. It's cool to think of the ties that bind us to others - others across town, across the country, across the world. This summer Becky, Rick and I had the opportunity to share a bit of our life, work, and ministry in Taiwan with our home church. It was great to form stronger ties with those already connect to us as prayer partners and wonderful to make new ties.

Finally, despite my current longings to be home experiencing a beautiful Fall, the song serves as a reminder that my delight should be found in the Lord, that my heart should be set on Heaven.

1.Blest be the tie that binds
Our hearts in Christian love
The fellowship of kindred minds
Is like to that above.

2. Before our Father's throne,
We pour our ardent prayers;
Our fears, our hopes, our aims are one,
Our comforts, and our cares.

3. We share our mutual woes,
Our mutual burdens bear;
And often for each other flows
The sympathizing tear.

4. When we asunder part,
It gives us inward pain;
But we shall be joined in heart,
And hope to meet again.

-John Fawcett, 1782

What a great reminder that no matter what far reaches of the earth I find myself, I am tied to those who lift me up in prayer and to those I pray for, bound to others by burdens shared, and joined with hearts in friendship and love.

Re-adjusting

My first week back on island from summer vacation could be characterized by a week of a solid Pop-Tart and popsicle diet followed by a week of cereal and slushies, though not combined. I'm pleased to say that I've finally incorporated the healthier and wiser choices of salad, fruits, omelets, and even soup. Due to my prevailing desire to have American foods, especially ones I can fix fast to limit my time spent in non-air conditioned rooms, I once again took to rummaging the cabinets in search of some treasures among the array of boxed and canned goods I've accumulated. What I found and settled upon was a can of Cream of Asparagus I bought a while back.

During all my years in the U.S., I never knew Campbell's made such a soup but leave it to Taiwan to import such an oddity. Anytime I have asparagus related grub, I'm usually reminded of the episode of Alf when Brian had to dress as a stalk of asparagus for a school play and his dad wrote a ditty for him to sing. It's one of the few episodes I remember. It's funny the things that stick with us from childhood, and sad the things that don't.

My discovery of the soup also brought to mind an episode with another American tv family. I couldn't help but recall the Simpson's episode with the hurricane that hit Springfield where everyone flocked to the store to stock up on necessities and all that was left when Marge got there were things like Creamed Eel. I suppose that while my meals for now might seem random or a bit odd, there will always be far worse, or at least more imaginative alternatives out there. As for now, I'm content to stick with the asparagus.

Kara needs . . .

I had forgotten how funny this can be until I was reminded by an old roomie's blog.
The basics: go to google, type "[your name] needs", and see what funny sentences are waiting to be made.

Here it goes:

1. Kara needs some eyebrow help.
2. Kara needs to be more humble.
3. Kara needs to remain as confused and as troubled as she is right now. (oh yeah!)
4. Kara needs a man.
5. Kara needs to have a civilian ID.
6. Kara needs to read on a daily basis. (Read. I knew I was forgetting to do something.)
7. Kara needs a little help getting her dress form out of the corner - and Santino won't help her - he's being really silly, honestly. (Dang you Santino, stop being so silly!)
8. Kara needs more cowbell! (I gotta have more cowbell.)
9. Kara needs prayer for a better job.
10. Kara needs to be picked up at the Ronald McDonald House.
11. Kara needs to be an esl teacher in Togo.
12. Kara needs to hear about Jesus.
13. Kara needs a man like a fish needs a bicylce.
13. Kara needs no one.
14. Kara needs a part time job and at least $400 a month from her parents. (Mom? Dad? Are you reading this?)
15. Kara needs to be trained by the Man of Steel.
16. Kara needs breathing space.
17. Kara needs business cards that say "Crash."
18. Kara needs a personal Tango guide.
19. Kara needs to be taken to a Pacific Island (Can I make a request? Tahiti or Bora Bora please.)
20. Kara needs someone to confide in
21. Kara needs coffee.
22. Kara needs to define who she is.
23. Kara needs to follow the yellow brick road.

kids in the kart

To my friend E, you're a dangerous gal. I think you remember people's childhood stories better than they do.

Well, here's a new one for ya. As I made a quick stop at the supermarket this afternoon, I was nearly run into by a mom pushing a shopping cart containing 2 young kids. Although, getting hit by a cart at this particular supermarket would not be anything out of the ordinary for me. Anyway, in place of a glare or eye roll, I couldn't help but crack a smile and chuckle when I saw the younger of the two boys in the cart, a tike under 2 years old. This was because his legs were decorated with marker doodles. I wonder if this was self-inflicted or the handiwork of his older bro. In any case, it reminded me of the good old days when my brothers and I used to give marker tattoos to each other, but particularly to my baby bro, something I had long forgotten about until today. For some reason, Mom was never thrilled to find the surprises on Todd's body when it was time to bathe him. Think what you will of me now, but in my defense, it was washable marker and I was not the worse culprit.

What else could I possibly drop in the toilet?

That's my question of the day. It seems as though my natural grace, a.k.a. clumsiness, is in full swing today. I don't even have lack of sleep to blame this time. It's just me. I'm just that clumsy that I dropped things in the toilet on 3 seperate occasions today.

Feel like some Japanesy?

Okay, this makes for my second question of the day. On my way home from work tonight I saw a sign for a Japanesy Supermarket. Umm, is that anything like a Japanese supermarket?

Back from Summer Bliss

Here I am, back from my month and a half disappearance from blogging. As I mentioned in a previous post, the summer, which is quickly fleeting, has been full yet fulfilling. Here's the break down of what's been happening:

Madness and mayhem began in June when it once again became time to teach children to jump through hoops on demand, or at least to teach one child to jump out of an oven while others chased him shouting- otherwise known as this year's kindergarten graduation production, The Gingerbread Man. Following the big event was a two day frenzy of converting the prop and costume making dungeon back into the livable space my apartment once was in time for my mom's visit.

Before the close of June, my mom arrived in Taiwan to begin her month long adventure. What a joy it was to have someone from my family finally come to visit and share in the experiences I talk and write about (okay, not the ones like the floor erupting or the gas explosion). It was great to have an excuse to visit my favorite restaurants and coffee/tea shops for a month, as well as a good reason to take weekend excursions to places like Kenting for a sand and surf break, Taipei to shop, sight-see, and ride in the world's fastest elevators to the observation level of the world's tallest building, Tai-chung to visit with friends, and Meinong, the hand-painted umbrella capital of Taiwan and place to make a special kind of tea.




As many moms tend to like to keep busy and feel useful wherever they are, it took awhile to get used to suddenly having a housekeeper and personal assistant around. I've been living sans roommate for almost a year now, so it was strange waking up to dishes that were already done. In all of her helping though, I especially loved that she was able to not only see but assist with a weekly children's Bible class that I lead.

My mom was able to visit my school and classes on a number of occasions. The kids, especially the younger ones, were usually excited to see her and not only because she often brought some candy to share. I let a few of my classes have an interview session and ask her questions. My highest level class with 10-12 year olds surprised me with their questions of "How did you meet your husband?" and "How did your husband ask you to marry him?" Not surprising though was the "How old are you?" question, but no cheating allowed. Several of my classes had been primed with my mom's real age, so they knew if she was trying to pull one over on them, much to her dismay. The best, however, had to be when one girl asked my mom what kind of make-up she uses because she wanted to tell her mom to use that kind so she can look young too.

I hope that with all the activity she was able to find her time in Taiwan relaxing and enjoyable, but if not, that's what our few days in Hong Kong were for - a sort of mini-vacation before a return home for my mom and a 2 week vacation at home for me. It amazes me how much we were able to cram into 3 days and yet still reflect upon the time in Hong Kong as relaxing. The highlights include visiting the not yet year old Hong Kong Disneyland, the Bird Garden, Flower Market, Jade Market, Hard Rock Cafe (for some Western food therapy, though the Chinese food we had was yummy), and a harbour cruise at night.




By the end of July, I was home at last. My mom, friends Becky and Rick, and I made the 3 hour ride home from the airport in style as my dad surprised us by picking us up in a stretch limo. Aside from the close proximity of family and friends, other wonderful things about being home included: fresh air, cooler temps, blue skies, green spaces, and stars. I also loved the fact that it doesn't get dark until around 9pm in the summer, I can drink the tap water, I can flush the toilet paper, I don't have to figure out how to translate things, and I can drive my car. Oh, and I love coming back and being able to shop at places such as Target and Walmart. It can be an almost overwhelming experience to suddenly be bombarded with so much choice and selection. I mean, whole aisles of nothing but cereal - who could want for more? Really though, it's not so much what's available as it is the fact that it is available, and at a fraction of the cost of imported goods in Asia.

For as much as stays the same from my year to year visits home, change is always inevitable. There are the tougher things to come back to, such as seeing loved ones in declining health and realizing those who have passed away within the course of the previous year really are no longer there. Thankfully, there are also joyous things to bring balance, such as marriages of friends and the birth of their children. Good or bad, it's sometimes challenging to come home to the reality of the life that goes on in my absence.

While at home this time, I greatly enjoyed hanging out with my bros, kayaking and road trips through the countryside with my dad, shopping and spending time with my mom, visits and phone calls with friends, backyard picnics, sleepovers, late night swims, cooking for my family as well as dinners out with them, visiting my home church, taking in a regional theater production, sweet corn from my uncle's farm, bowling, spending time with people, and just being at home.




My apartment never felt so empty as it did after spending a month and a half with people I'm closest to. Walking in the door after arriving back felt both awkward and sad, as reminders of my mom's visit still littered the apartment. Though I've made this trip several times, for some reason, I just wasn't anticipating the sudden shock of being alone again, something that I usually don't mind. My foreign apartment felt just that - foreign. As with each trip home, for the first few days I wake up in the morning expecting to open my eyes to my room in PA, to warm sunshine and a cool breeze, to birds chirping outside the window, but that's not the case. In its place is the drone of the air conditioner, a dog barking on a balcony, someone practicing a piano upstairs, and construction on the street below. It takes a bit before I stop wishing I'm still at home, before routine takes over, before life keeps on racing on.

It's the Grand Cha-hee-hee's birthday!

Wow, I can hardly believe my baby bro is 20 years old today!
I can still remember the day you were born - the day it was confirmed that I indeed had another brother and not a sister as I specifically requested. Oh, those crazy storks. Well, I learned to love you anyway. Happy Birthday Bro!

What's hiding in your cabinets?

Times of packing for travel or moving often bring about the discovery of things long forgotten in the back of closets, cabinets, or under the bed. While this certainly rang true while preparing for my recent trip home, my surprise discovery today was made while rummaging for a snack in the kitchen. I found a bag of Christmas tree shaped Doritos hiding in a cabinet. It's Christmas in July, okay, August. Wow, I wonder what other surprises await.

Departing

"I'm leaving on a jet plane, don't know when I'll be back again."

That song seems to be on replay in my mind this evening as I gather, sort, and pack. I've just enjoyed two wonderful weeks at home on vacation and sadly I depart for the airport in about 2 hours to return to Taiwan. Each time I come home I find it a bit harder to go back and during my last few days I usually find myself wondering, "Why would I ever want to leave this place?" If it were not for returning to friendships in Taiwan, it would be even more difficult to convince myself to go back.

Though changes do occur in my absence, the ease with which I've been able to slip back into my life at home makes it all the more difficult to believe that a whole year passes between my visits. Falling back into place at home makes it difficult to imagine I have a whole other life on the other side of the world. However, I'm about to rejoin the reality of that other world quite soon. Fortunately my work schedule has been a bit lighter than usual this summer, so I appreciate that I'll have a bit more free time to unpack and process the past two weeks and two months. It's been a full yet fullfilling summer and there are still a few more weeks to go before another summer draws to a close. I hope to soon bring you up to speed on the events of my summer but for now, I've got to finish packing!

blogging blitz

No, your eyes don't deceive you, I have suddenly been writing, a lot. Actually, I just came to the realization that I needed to dust off the cobwebs and finish the half-dozen drafts that I had saved.

I've got a busy summer ahead. The kindergarten graduation program is next weekend, my mom arrives in 9 days, and in about a month I'm going to Hong Kong and home for a visit. I can't promise my writing will ever become more consistent, but I'm sure the summer will provide plently to write about, when I eventually have the time. Hope your summer is shaping up well.

a dark-eyed boy, aye-chihuahua!

For the most part, I'm strictly a no dog sort of person. I don't mind the occasional pet sitting and I don't mind going to my friends' homes who are dog owners, however, I'm content to do without a pooch in my pad. However, I have perhaps met my match. If there was ever a dog to cause me to stumble and consider pet ownership, it's a tiny, dark eyed chihuahua my eyes beheld last night. Usually, I don't even give chihuahuas a second glance, they strike me as annoying, not cute, but this one knew all the right moves to look pathetically adorable. Sigh. I should have inquired as to the price. That would have fixed my fixation real quick. Pet shop pups are not cheap, which is why a lot of foreigners opt for adopting a park dog.

Don't worry mom, there won't be any 4 legged friend waiting to greet you when you come visit.

under an indigo sky

Last night I went for an evening dip in the pool at my friend's place. While the pool is outdoors, most of it is covered by an overhang, above which an apartment tower rises. There's a small section where the pool juts out from the overhang and suddenly you're between towers and beneath the sky. As I lazily floated at the end of my swim, I hung out for a bit beneath the indigo sky. It was nice. I felt almost as though I was no longer in the city. Thoughts drifted to an evening when we relaxing on a riverbank under a starlit sky, soaking where water from a hot spring and cold river merged. Ahh, the mountains, haven't been there in awhile. For now, I'll have to make due with evenings beneath an indigo sky and the memories of the world that exists beyond the city.

throw another squid on the barbie

About 2 weeks ago I decided to gather a few co-workers and friends for a BBQ at my place. Perhaps it was Taiwan finally wearing me down, but I had a hankering for grilled squid as I perused the meat dept. at my local supermarket. I knew most of my guests enjoy this tentacular treat so I picked up a few.

Then came the realization that I'd have to clean them. Now I've cooked squid before, but it was part of a Thai cooking class and I think they were already gutted and cleaned, we just had to skin and slice them. Anyone who's been fishing with me knows, I love to fish but I have two rules: I don't touch the bait and I don't touch the fish. I'll gladly catch 'em if I can, but handling slimy or crawly things is not really for me. So there I found myself facing a cutting board of fresh squid and no one to pass the dirty work along to.

Well, after some quick online research and a few deep breaths, I handled those squid like a pro, or so I'd like to think. Actually, I got the hang of it right away and didn't break a single ink sack. I also didn't vomit or faint, always a plus. After getting past the first one, I really didn't mind cleaning them. I'm also pleased to say that the post-grilled squid turned out quite well too. Most of it never found its way to the table as people quickly snatched it from the grill or from the plate as it was passed from the balcony, through the living room on the way to the kitchen. I was lucky to even get a piece to try. Mmm, squid. ; )

happiness is . . .
morning dew,
a new photo to adorn my walls

Tonight I was able to pick up a picture I purchased from a recent photo gallery showing of a friend of a friend's work. He has taken some amazing photos and I've enjoyed checking out his work online as well as reading about his and his girlfriend's travels in SE Asia. I was glad to see that one of my favorite photos was not only included in the show but also available for sale.

According to the photographer, the story behind the photo is this:
It was taken on Christmas Eve in 2005 in the morning light after hiking all night up a mountainside under a full moon. Being amongst the clouds, a soft dew covered everything in the morning, including insect life. The mountain he hiked happens to be Mount Merapi, the one that's been erupting recently in Indonesia. What a unique experience and a cool memory to capture, huh?

So why do I like this photo so much? I thought the details on the butterfly, right down to the droplets of dew, were amazing. I also liked the contrast between something that seemed so delicate and fragile next to something rugged and harsh. Finally, I liked how the softened background makes the vivid colors of life all the more apparent.

(um, for anyone who hadn't noticed, I set up links so you can view the photo as well as The Black Azar's other work, if you wish.)

Mr. Creepy, Part Deux

same city, new guy, the next day

After an evening of cultural enhancement, a.k.a. catching a theater production in a neighboring city, 2 friends and I returned to our city an proceeded to catch a cab ride home. Oh, somehow the mouth strained red from betel nut should have been the give away to select another cab driver; we have been in Taiwan long enough to know better. But it was too late, we were already opening the doors and crawling inside. Rather than the three of us cram into the back seat, I thought I'd be courteous and take a turn up front, and therein lied mistake number two. Mistake three was attempting to fasten my seatbelt. You would think it should be the other way around, but it wasn't. Normally when sitting in the front of a cab, the driver will remind you and even insist upon the seatbelt being worn because it's the law so they're afraid of getting fined. However, as we pulled away from the train station, our driver began flailing his arms, making a choking/strangling gesture, and speaking loudly in unintelligible Chinese as the red spit from the betel nut flew from his mouth.

What? Does he really think I don't know how to fasten a seatbelt that he thinks I'm going to strangle myself? He gestures something from behind. My friend tries her best to understand some scrap of his dialog to interpret for us. What? Is he trying to tell me don't put the top part behind me or I should put it behind me? More gesturing, loud unintelligible comments, and spit from the driver. Umm, is he trying to say that someone was strangled by the seatbelt in this car? By this point we're almost halfway back to my friend's house and my seatbelt still isn't fastened because the driver is insistent that I don't buckle it and he's paying frightfully little attention to the road. Is he trying to tell me that if there's an accident, I could be decapitated or strangled by my seatbelt? Then why is he wearing his???

I give up. I let go of the seatbelt and any hopes of wearing it hoping the driver will abandon his efforts as well and pay attention to actually driving but alas, he doesn't. He now doesn't seem quite as distressed that I'm going to try to buckle up and my friend can begin to understand a bit more of his speech, though that didn't make things any less confusing or disturbing.

When all was said and done, basically what we synopsized was this: He was trying to tell us something about if we are riding with a stranger and they use the highway, we should never wear our seatbelt if riding in the front seat, especially if they insist upon it because they could use it to strangle us. This is apparently something that has occurred in Taiwan. As troubling as this piece of information was, what was disconcerting is that he still wouldn't let me buckle up. First of all, we weren't on the highway, we were in the middle of the city. Secondly, it's not like I was traveling by myself, we outnumbered the guy 3 to 1. And third, he was in no condition to try anything. So why, in this particular instance would he not let me buckle up? Okay, we get the story, thanks for sharing, but what does that have to do with me not buckling up now? Are you trying to say that if I buckle up, you're going to try to strangle me? Seriously, that's what we were all starting to wonder.

Finally, we arrived safely back at my friend's building. As I was getting out of the taxi, I noticed the open can of beer in the cup holder and an empty one on the floor, the sight of which had been previously blocked by my bag. Nice, very nice.

Mr. Creepy

Forget about skulking in dark alleys, some people are content with being creepy in public places in broad daylight.

On a particular afternoon a few weeks ago, I had decided to head downtown to spend my lunch break strolling in a park that I really like yet rarely frequent. Besides wanting to get outside to enjoy lovely spring weather, I had ambitions of finishing up a roll of film during my outing. Upon entering the park, I saw at a distance a man walking my direction. Nothing unusual about that, this park is frequented by many people on their lunch break. As soon as he sees me, however, he makes a quick right turn and proceeds through some bushes. I also turn because it's the direction I need to go for the afore mentioned photo taking.

As I pause to finish a text message, I begin to have the funny feeling that I'm being followed and notice that the man is walking parallel with me, yet still at a distance. I take a few steps, he takes a few steps. I pause, he pauses. As I pause again to pretend to look at some sculptures (really it's to figure out what to make of the guy and get a good survey of the other people in the park) I find that he's now sitting on a large rock, yet looking back over his shoulder at me.

I once again proceed towards the object of my photographic endeavor, walking more briskly this time. I glance back to see if I'm being followed. Nope, no sign of him. Wait. Oh yes, there comes the floating head from behind a big rock. There he stands just staring at me and there I stand just staring back, in disbelief that he thinks I have no idea he's watching me. "Oh no, if your body's behind a giant rock, there's no way I'll notice a head sticking out from the side of it!" Come on. As I continue on, I have to walk through an area of tall shrubbery and evergreens. This is an easy place for someone to lurk, however, there are still people around chatting, landscaping, reading, etc. so I feel in no real danger.

Suddenly, dunt-dunt-duh ... the phone rings and I begin to explain to my friend the events of the afternoon. I sit down in a spot that's a bit blocked from view by anyone approaching from behind. This happens to be right beside the object I wish to take photos of. Within a minute or two, mr. creepy crosses the large walkway infront of where I was sitting, heading in the direction away from me. I continue to hang out and give my friend the play-by-play. Meanwhile, good old mr. creepy "disappears" behind some bushes on the other side of the walkway. Oh yes, most of his body is hidden from view, but there comes the floating head again bobbing up and down between the hedges. Every now and then he'd disappear from view for a bit, but sure enough, 'bloop', up pops the head again. I just stood on a ledge watching him, still entertained by the fact that he probably honestly thought I couldn't see him or that I had no idea he was watching me. By this point, about a half hour had transpired from the time I entered the park. Finally I lost sight of him in between the bobbing and then a few minutes later I saw the back of his red shirt in the distance as he walked away, or at least, as he appeared to be walking away.

Now was the time for me to make my move. I got off the phone and began checking out the angles of what I wanted to photograph. It was a structure that I could step inside, and sure enough, about a minute or two after I did, out pops mr. creepy from the bushes, only I think he had lost sight of me this time, as I noticed him searching around a bit. As he did, he came right up to the structure before seeing me inside. This was the closest he'd come and it was at this moment I decided to whip out my camera and point it right at him, and that was the end of mr. creepy. He disappeared really quick after that. When I was ready to leave, I kept looking around to see if I was still being "secretly" followed but nope, no sign of him. Still, I didn't breathe a sigh of relief until I was on my scooter in traffic again. Ya, one of the few times I was ever actually relieved to be in traffic.

Just another day in traffic

While driving home during my lunch break this afternoon, I witnessed a woman fly through a traffic light and strike a man on the crosswalk. I'm sure she would argue that it wasn't her fault since, after all, she did honk her horn insanely to warn everyone that she had no intention of stopping at the light. My impression here is that if you honk your horn loud enough and long enough, that sort of relinquishes any responsibility on the part of the driver to actually obey traffic rules. Here I come, you've been warned!

I think one of the things that bothers me the most about driving here is the number of avoidable accidents if people would just exercise some common sense. Prior to coming here, I had read something in Lonely Planet to the effect of "the Taiwanese would drown in their own bathtub," which is totally harsh but it sort of summed up the writer's impression of common sense in Taiwan. Sadly, on far too many occasions, I've seen how one might come to such a conclusion, especially while on the road.

Today I started reading a new book that I recently acquired and already, I'm hooked. While I've read several good books so far this year, it's been awhile since I've read one that I just couldn't put down and once again look for scraps of free time when I can squeeze in some more reading. I consider myself a slow reader so it's nice when I have something that I'll push myself through quickly. Ironically, my latest literary addiction is a book about addiction.

English is Fashionable

"A day for chic dream genies and decadent dandy lion nights, for periwinkle platinum and arcane delights" - as seen on a shirt recently by a friend.

Here's a throwback to my days of perusing wearables at American Eagle or scoping out a unique gift at Pier 1 with scrawlings of Chinese or some form of Asian calligraphy. Did I ever stop to wonder what things said or if they even said anything at all? Not really. Sometimes words appear as art and the content seems irrelevant. I've now entered a life on the flipside where I crack up at the saying on clothing because I understand what the wearers often don't. I also understand when there's nothing to be understood, just random letters on something.
Ah, English is fashionable. So why am I never in-style?

"Do you have a Zans for cans?"

Oh Dr. Seuss, how I wish I had a Zans for cans. For 8 months I've been fighting with a can opener that seems quite good at chewing the labels off of cans but not good at actually OPENING CANS! Arrh.

Recently, feeling inspired to make some chili, I resigned myself to the fact that I'd first have to open cans, many, many cans. Part way through the can butchering experience, I started thinking about how often things work backwards here. Throw your "righty-tighty, lefty-loosey" out the window, it will get you nowhere. Then I started to wonder what would happen if I turned the can opener handle the opposite way, an idea so against my years of conditioning that I never considered the possibility that it could turn the opposite direction. Wouldn't you know it, the can was sliced open with relative ease.

Oh the object lessons that can occur in daily life. It's funny how something as simple as a can opener needing turned the opposite direction can be a reminder of stubbornness, blindness, and pride. While there are certainly things worth persistence despite the frustrations and setbacks that will be encountered, there are other things worth throwing out because pursuing them would be as silly as taking 8 months to figure out how to use a can opener.

Friday at last

Another work week has drawn to a close and a weekend island hop awaits. Shao Lui Chui, here I come - where the water is salty, the air humid, and the pace of life just right for a relaxing weekend.

Off to the store to pick up some snacks, drinks, and a camping and beach essential, nail polish. Oh, you think I jest, but sadly, I do not. Spending a length of time outdoors means a whole host of gangly stuff is going to take up residence under your nails and try as you may to be hygienic, it's somewhat of a losing battle, so I'd rather just not see it. Out of sight, out of mind. Ignorance is bliss. (Okay, I'm not really that gross.)

Also on the packing list, some New Zealand Beauties, my new favorite apple. I've found munching fruit a helpful way to keep hydrated. Now time to catch a whopping 2 hours of sleep before an early morning drive and boat ride. It seems as though the fumes of the insecticide sprayed at my apt. complex yesterday have finally seeped inside so I think my planned escape could perhaps be saving me from finally being done in by toxic city life. On that happy note, have a great weekend!

Spring Green

asparagus, Granny Smith apple, shamrock, inch worm, fern

Have you toured a crayon box lately? Things sure have changed since I was a kid. As I worked on a project with students that involved a bit of coloring, I began taking notice to the names on the broken bits of color sticks that comprised our giant Crayola box.

Today's names come in an imaginative variety from macaroni-and-cheese, to wild blue yonder, fuzzy-wuzzy brown, outer space, Purple Heart, purple mountain's majesty, wild strawberry, and tumbleweed.

A quick visit to the Crayola website revealed many of these colors were not as new as I thought them to be, thanks to the handy chronology of colors. What began as 8 colors in 1903 has expanded to the present 120 hues. Even more interesting was seeing how changing times in the U.S. have influenced the names of colors.

A lift in spirits has recently accompanied my days of city dwelling as two of my favorite colors, blue and green, have become more prevalent during daily commutes and outings. The usual grey funk that rules the sky has given way to blue made all the more lovely with the addition of white clouds.

Not only is spring in the air but on the plants and trees that line the roads and fill the parks. I had almost forgotten about that tint of green that exists with the newness of life that blossoms this time of year. In a place with year round greenery and subtle season changes, the radiant color of spring green highlighted by warm morning light reminds me of what it means to have spring return.

Yo-ho, yo-ho, a pirate's wife for me and the tale of 7 virtuous ladies

My wardrobe selections have been getting interesting reactions at work lately though i haven't been wearing anything out of the ordinary or even new. However, here are some of my favorites from the past few weeks:

the pirate's wife- Something about the skirt I wore had a whole class declaring I must have married a pirate since the previous day.

Cinderella- Wear a choice bracelet and suddenly you're Cinderella, though later in the class I was demoted to the step-mother.

Thailand vacationer or beach mystic - While part of the class thought I looked as though I'd just returned from a weekend in Thailand, a few others thought I could pass for a beach fortune teller. Ahh yes, I can see homework in your future. On this particular day as I entered school everyone sort of paused and stared until one secretary declared, "It's your birthday!" No, but thanks. Seriously, do I dress that poorly the other days of the year?

Greek statue - Okay, this one was not based on something I wore but rather a suggestion for the future. My highest level class has been studying ancient Greece and the Olympics lately and during class one boy had the brilliant idea that if I were to dress as a Greek statue and pose outside the school we'd suddenly gain new students by the droves. Why? Because they'd all stop and think, "what interesting and funny teachers they have there. I must go to that school." I can't help but think my appearance as a Greek statue would have the reverse effect on the school.

And now coming full circle to the topic of pirates (arrrh!), here's something interesting I recently came upon flipping through the pages of a Taiwan guide book:

Cimei Island, the southernmost of the Penghu archipelago, is named after seven legendary local beauties who threw themselves down a well rather than have their virtue despoiled by a gang of marauding pirates. The simple Tomb of the Seven Virtuous Beauties at the island's southern tip honors their sacrifice; the tomb is built over the well. - taken from National Geographic Traveler Taiwan

the fine art of text messaging

One benefit to living in Taiwan is that cell phone service costs far less than it does in the U.S. As a result, friends and I take advantage of text messaging, however, user beware, you never know what you're going to find when you open a message. My personal favorite thus far this year reads as follows:

"Just found out that a new sign in my elevator says, 'please take your garbage down to the dumpster and do not just throw it out your window.' "

Life in Rewind

It's hard to believe I haven't blogged in about 2 months! I guess for part of that time, too much was happening that I didn't have time to write and for the other part, there wasn't much worth writing about. Without some freak catastrophe occurring at my building, I suppose life can be a bit dull, but that's okay. Between things falling apart at will, the living room floor cracking open, and the gas explosion, I've perhaps learned to start expecting the unexpected around here. For awhile I found myself approaching the elevator with caution wondering if a cable snap would be the next big surprise in store for me. Where did I put my Worst Case Scenario Survival Handbook?

Basically, to recap, since my January entry we've had a few holidays in Taiwan, starting with Chinese New Year, or Lunar New Year. I enjoyed 2 weeks of vacation between the end of January and the beginning of February. The first week of my time off I spent at home doing very little. I did enjoy catching up on sleep, movies, things around the house, and catching up with friends here. I got to hike one of the mountains near the sea that offers some great viewpoints as well as cool banyan trees perfect for climbing.

The second week of vacation was spent in New Zealand. Though I had been wanting to go there for awhile, my trip was actually planned quite last minute, as in I bought the tickets one day and flew out the next. Until I actually got there and got settled, I couldn't help wondering, "Did I just make a huge mistake? What am I getting myself into now?", but it was great! A week is certainly not long enough so I definitely hope to go back one day. I spent most of my time touring the South Island but spent a day and a half sailing and sight-seeing in Auckland before returning to Taiwan.

As 9 rolls of film might suggest, for a trip that was only a week long, there's a lot to say about New Zealand. I'll spare you from most of it right now, but I did want to share a few journal entries.

1/31/2006

Where am I? My body is currently at rest on a most comfy bed at a hotel in Queenstown, N.Z. My body, however, feels as though it's still in motion aboard a bus or a boat, two places which I spent the day.

Where am I? Right here and a thousand miles away. Transfixed on the scenery before me, a feast for the eyes, my thoughts are free to roam from what I am seeing to what I saw this time last year and from the possibilities of the future to the memories of the past. Thoughts drift from old desires to new, old friendships to new ones, the old year to the present.

One day, a million thoughts, indescribable beauty. Lakes, streams, mountains, plains, hills, glaciers, fiords, palms, pines, lowlands, highlands, sheep, deer, cattle, ostrich, green, grey, yellow, blue, white, clouds, rain, and sun. It was a full day, nay, it's been a full few days.

2/3/2006
I look out the window. Colors and lighting seem perfect here. The sky's always a perfect blue. The lighting has a way of making things look amazing. Yellows, greens, and blues are so rich, not washed out. Even the clouds look amazing. They have an almost unnatural quality about them, as though they're from a painting.

What a whirlwind week it's been. The days have been so full they've felt like more than single days. I don't mind though. It's great to be back somewhere with long summer days, where there's still light until 9-9:30pm.

Today's been a day of planes, trains, and automobiles not to mention buses and vans. This morning I left Franz Josef to complete my circle of the South Island. From there it was travel by bus to Greymouth, stopping at some scenic spots along the way. Once in Greymouth, I boarded the Tranz Alpine Train for a 4 hour trip from the west to east coast across Arthur's Pass. We went through numerous tunnels, one extending for 5.6 miles and taking 15 minutes to get through. We also crossed over several viaducts - high train bridges through the gorges. Arriving in Christchurch, I was met by a shuttle van to get back into the city where I transferred to a cab to get to the airport where I presently find myself still waiting for a flight that was scheduled to depart 40 minutes ago.

About a week after Chinese New Year was Lantern Festival, generally one of my favorite holidays in Taiwan. I've always enjoyed an evening stroll along the river checking out the lanterns. This year I was a bit disappointed. I think the displays have been better in the past, but it was still nice.

Since then it seems like it suddenly became March and now here we are nearing the end of the month already. Last weekend I got to enjoy the company of 2 old roommates who stayed over on the weekend. It was a bit like old times again, only better. Last Sunday we celebrated Becky's birthday outdoors at the Youth Activity Center where the young at heart can act like kids again while the kids, at least the jr. high ones, rolled their eyes at our childishness. It was a great afternoon complete with water fights, cargo nets, suspended rope bridges and chair swings, and crazy group activity obstacle things like we had back in the days of summer camp.

Hopefully this will fill you in a bit as to the past 2 months and hopefully it won't be another 2 before I write again.

An Odd Sort of Wednesday

Odd discovery: toothpaste expires
Odd piece of knowledge acquired: how to pop an eyeball back into place should it happen to fall out
Odd contrast: while driving to work bundled in layers: t-shirt, sweatshirt, winter coat, I pass another foreigner wearing a t-shirt, shorts, and sandals
Odd rival: having to contend with karaoke music from a nearby streetside wedding reception while teaching class
Odd sighting: on my way home from work, being passed in traffic by a man riding a motorcycle, clad in motorcycle garb and a bear head (?)
Odd timing: within an hour of picking up the apartment key, my former soon-to-be-new-roommate's boss called to inform her she's being transferred to Taipei in a few weeks
Odd way to end the day: having a Nudge war on messenger

Pieces, Paper, Pictures, Peace

Monday was a more difficult day than I had expected. I thought cleaning up the pieces Sunday night would have me feeling more whole by the next day, but as I shared on Monday, I couldn't escape reliving the event in my mind.

I'm glad to say that with each passing day, the thoughts of Sunday night have become less frequent. In my memory, the force of the blast lessens, the sounds dampen, and the images dim. I hardly even thought about it yesterday and today unless, for some reason, I've had to. I can move about the apartment with confidence again and even going onto the laundry balcony at night doesn't bother me. The quiet of my afternoons and evenings at home is once again full of peace rather than uneasiness.

Like a breath of fresh air, good news recently came from a friend back home and from friends here. Such glad tidings have been carrying me through the week as well as God's grace.


News of what happened did reach the local papers with front page color photos. With the aid of some students translating the Chinese, I learned the story of what happened, most of which I already knew from the rumors and speculations flying amongst the neighbors Sunday night. The basics: gas explosion in home behind my building, 3 people injured - one inside the home and 2 passing by on the street (though this didn't take into account the people injured in my building), husband and wife had been arguing, wife left the home and man attempted suicide by turning on the gas. I got back some photos this week, a few of which show the broken glass at my house and a view of the damage at the home of the explosion, looking directly down from my kitchen window (and one looking up at broken glass awning).



On a final note, this morning I got to ride the elevator with the man from my building who was injured by the explosion. His hands were bandaged and his walk was labored. In fact, he could only walk with the support of someone. Still, he managed a faint smile as he exited the elevator. I'm sure his life will not be the same for some time yet.

Stuck on Replay

I thought I wouldn't sleep well last night after what happened, but I did. As I soon discovered, it's not my sleeping that's haunted, it's my waking.

How do you forget something that, in every recess of silence, replays itself? A scooter beside me in traffic backfires and I nearly jump out of my skin. Someone closes a classroom door too hard and I hold my breath waiting for shattered glass to fall. Even the soft sound of water flowing through the upstairs neighbor's pipes makes me nervous as it sounds too much like the hiss of gas.

Home can not be the sanctuary it once was. I used to consider this place a treasure because it's rare to find places in the city so quiet. Now the once peaceful silence is uncomfortable as every sound seems magnified. Even as midnight approaches the day after the event, I can still hear the occasional sound of glass hitting the pavement below. In the daylight, things are better, but at night I approach the kitchen with hesitation.

It really is stuck on replay in my mind. I could feel it, hear it, and see it over and over again all day. I can now begin to imagine what it must feel like to live somewhere effected by war and bombings. I've had only a glimpse of this - the surprise, the force, the sounds, the commotion, and that was more than enough.

an explosion, shattered glass, darkness, alarms, screams, crying, blood, panic, sirens, questions. This was my Sunday evening ...

...but now, Monday morning has returned. It's raining outside as though to wash away the thoughts of what happened last night, but the memories of such will not be so easily forgotten, at least not until the clean up is finished. For now, the sound of broken glass being swept and gathered can still be heard from the street below.

It occurred sometime near 6:00 pm. The evening was suddenly disturbed by an invisible force- a loud blast, an explosion, and the sound of breaking glass, shattered and raining to the floor. Darkness seemed everywhere. Evening had already settled in outside and the lights inside were off except for that of the tv. Was that a bomb? Get out! Those were the first thoughts I could process. Flinging on my coat, shoes, and purse, I fled. Outside the door, fire alarms were ringing and flashing on each level. Proceeding down the stairwell 9 floors, I was met by neighbors. Glass, plaster, and mortar crunched underfoot on the landings between floors. Outside we waited. The sirens of approaching fire trucks, police cars, and ambulances filled the night, as did the voices of panic, yelling, and crying.

I reached for my phone to call Becky but what do I say? "I'm okay, I'm okay" is all that comes out at first. I must have sounded crazy but it was the first time in all of this I was forced to pause, process, and vocalize what had just happened. And what had just happened? I still didn't know. How do you describe something you've yet begun to understand? Looking around, windows and glass doors were gone everywhere from lower level apartments and neighboring houses. The sounds of glass falling could still be heard through the commotion. Look! There was one of my downstairs neighbors, someone I've shared the elevator with a number of times. Tonight though, he was staggering from the building, shirt-less, shoe-less, and still in shock, cut and bleeding all over, no doubt from flying glass.

Eventually the crowd dwindled until mostly only those from my tower remained, awaiting instruction. By this point we had learned that a gas explosion occurred at a home directly behind my apartment building. Once things were under control at the source, firemen came to inspect our homes, the building manager came to take photos, and friends came to be of support and help clean up. What amazing friends I have here! Having a better idea of what transpired and knowing that I was okay should have been enough to make me feel okay again. However, I suppose emotions operate on a sense of logic all their own. I sent Becky a message that things were okay now, we could even go back into our homes, so she didn't have to come over, but she still did, along with Rick. I can't tell you how much of a help it was to have them around, not just because Rick cleaned up most of the glass and Becky contacted the landlady to notify her about what happened. Their presence alone was a comfort to me and it was nice to have someone to babble to about what happened. At that time, I think conversation was the only thing saving me from having the event replay in my head. I hadn't realized until later how much I needed the diversion that they provided.

We got the glass cleaned up rather quickly, headed out for some fresh air and a bite to eat, and then came back and watched a movie. Dinner and a movie with friends - seems like such a normal way to spend a night on the weekend - an ending so different from how the evening began.

life, death, and the heaviness of uncertainty

Where's a rooftop when I need one? No, I'm not thinking about jumping. The rooftop has become a place I associate as my safety when the weight of the world and the heaviness of the day become a bit too great. At my previous apartment, the roof became my place of solace where my roommate, and friend, Becky and I could escape the day for a bit at night. On the rooftop I could release my burdens, casting them into the night without knowing where the wind would carry my words, my cries, my tears, my songs. On the rooftop, burdens shared became burdens lightened. What joy there is in having someone to confide in, someone to dump on, someone who continues to want to listen, and someone who will pray with you and for you.

Though I moved from that place 2 years ago, there are still nights when I miss those evenings on the roof. I think this past week in particular was a week made for the roof. Each day seemed to bring bad news from some direction back home - news of death, hardships in life, and uncertainty for the future. My heart was heavy this week with a burden for those I'm far from but feel so near to. However, there's comfort in knowing I don't need a roof to cry out to God and that good friends are still close by.

Toto, we're not in Kansas anymore.

This morning I discovered that if I ever long for adventure, I need bound no farther than my own back door. The back gate opens to narrow streets and alleys, often dead to the world except for the activity in the schoolyard. Though on its sidewalks and streets I may have stepped a hundred times, give time a twist and none of that matters. Containers of live shrimp that one can select by hand and strange fish I've not seen the likes of before are presented for purchase. Tables of beautiful tea boxes and long rows of incense easily catch one's eye, as does a feast of colors at fruit stands. Behold, freshly picked oranges with leaves still attached.

It was clear as I turned the corner, I was entering a world that was not mine. It was clear that I was seeing an old place for the first time. It was clear that I was going somewhere many foreigners did not venture. Neighbors moved about from table to table aquiring fresh ingredients for afternoon and evening meals. And there I was, in the middle of it all, feeling completely out of place in a place I thought familiar. Before me, a feast of curiosity for my eyes and yet, an overwhelming sense that I didn't belong. Not even my hat and sunglasses could disguise that I was not the typical sort to frequent this early morning market, yet I was glad to have had an opportunity to see a world I never knew existed beyond my own back door.

when the brakes go and other tales of broken things

Scene 1: road. female scooter commander maneuvering like something out of a video game in effort to survive another afternoon commute to work. a row of traffic lights, red, then in a wave, green. without haste, traffic regains its pace. taxi driver, 2 o'clock, disregards his own red light and attempts to proceed through the steady stream of on-coming traffic. nearest to kissing yellow metal, yours truly. brakes applied. unfamiliar snap. no slowing, no halting. left hand brake makes contact with handlebar and does not recoil.

make a face and brace for impact. this is gonna hurt.

or not.

freeze. for the next second or two, surrounding world appears to have paused during which time the current situation and inevitable fate become apparent.

enter plot twist. impending doom rejected. taxi slows and a last second duck and dodge save the day.

new hobby, dodgeball. after all, if you can dodge a taxi, you can dodge a ball.

Scene 2: kitchen. after a long run, thirsty apartment dweller seeks glass of H2O refreshment. open cabinet door below sink to check water filter. cabinet door falls off.

Scene 3: bathroom. afore mentioned apartment dweller seeks post-jog shower. turn on tub faucet. turn on shower. shower head falls off into tub below.

* Side note: In the story of the brakes going, under normal circumstances, the right hand brake (front brake) would have come to my aid. However, it just so happened my scooter was due to have the oil changed and front brake tightened that week, so I really had basically no stopping power. What a time for the brakes to go, when faced with what appeared to be inevitable impact! Thankfully things worked out differently.

the song in my heart and on my lips as I awoke this morning:

Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and put a new and loyal spirit in me.
Do not banish me from your presence;
do not take your Holy Spirit away from me.
Give me again the joy that comes from your salvation,
and make me willing to obey you.

(Psalms 51:10-12)

as I enter the new year, I find this to be my prayer, my cry, my song

God forgive me for approaching what you ask of me unwillingly, provide a peace in taking on new challenges, and please accept what I do as it is now done with a willing and joyful heart.