Mr. Creepy, Part Deux

same city, new guy, the next day

After an evening of cultural enhancement, a.k.a. catching a theater production in a neighboring city, 2 friends and I returned to our city an proceeded to catch a cab ride home. Oh, somehow the mouth strained red from betel nut should have been the give away to select another cab driver; we have been in Taiwan long enough to know better. But it was too late, we were already opening the doors and crawling inside. Rather than the three of us cram into the back seat, I thought I'd be courteous and take a turn up front, and therein lied mistake number two. Mistake three was attempting to fasten my seatbelt. You would think it should be the other way around, but it wasn't. Normally when sitting in the front of a cab, the driver will remind you and even insist upon the seatbelt being worn because it's the law so they're afraid of getting fined. However, as we pulled away from the train station, our driver began flailing his arms, making a choking/strangling gesture, and speaking loudly in unintelligible Chinese as the red spit from the betel nut flew from his mouth.

What? Does he really think I don't know how to fasten a seatbelt that he thinks I'm going to strangle myself? He gestures something from behind. My friend tries her best to understand some scrap of his dialog to interpret for us. What? Is he trying to tell me don't put the top part behind me or I should put it behind me? More gesturing, loud unintelligible comments, and spit from the driver. Umm, is he trying to say that someone was strangled by the seatbelt in this car? By this point we're almost halfway back to my friend's house and my seatbelt still isn't fastened because the driver is insistent that I don't buckle it and he's paying frightfully little attention to the road. Is he trying to tell me that if there's an accident, I could be decapitated or strangled by my seatbelt? Then why is he wearing his???

I give up. I let go of the seatbelt and any hopes of wearing it hoping the driver will abandon his efforts as well and pay attention to actually driving but alas, he doesn't. He now doesn't seem quite as distressed that I'm going to try to buckle up and my friend can begin to understand a bit more of his speech, though that didn't make things any less confusing or disturbing.

When all was said and done, basically what we synopsized was this: He was trying to tell us something about if we are riding with a stranger and they use the highway, we should never wear our seatbelt if riding in the front seat, especially if they insist upon it because they could use it to strangle us. This is apparently something that has occurred in Taiwan. As troubling as this piece of information was, what was disconcerting is that he still wouldn't let me buckle up. First of all, we weren't on the highway, we were in the middle of the city. Secondly, it's not like I was traveling by myself, we outnumbered the guy 3 to 1. And third, he was in no condition to try anything. So why, in this particular instance would he not let me buckle up? Okay, we get the story, thanks for sharing, but what does that have to do with me not buckling up now? Are you trying to say that if I buckle up, you're going to try to strangle me? Seriously, that's what we were all starting to wonder.

Finally, we arrived safely back at my friend's building. As I was getting out of the taxi, I noticed the open can of beer in the cup holder and an empty one on the floor, the sight of which had been previously blocked by my bag. Nice, very nice.