apparently, I don't live here anymore

In Taiwan, most apartment buildings and housing compounds are equipped with 24 hr security guard service. As a result, in addition to paying rent each month, there is a building management/maintenance fee (in short referred to as guard fee). For my apartment, it's about $45US/month, a price that to me seems a bit steep for a building that appears to have seen its glory days about a decade ago. Don't get me wrong though, I love my apt., which is why I choose to live at present locale despite the general decline of the compound on the whole.

So, imagine my surprise and delight at the end of February when I received my March guard bill and discovered the amount had been reduced by half. Yippee! There was a handwritten note in Chinese on the line beside the new fee. I had a Taiwanese friend translate the note but not much sense was made from it. What she surmised was that the fee was reduced because of giving up a car parking space. However, I had never had/utilized a car parking space, so why was I now getting a discount for giving up something I never had to begin with? I'd have to wait until the landlady came to straighten things out. Perhaps she'd have some insight.

March came and had almost passed entirely while the bill remained unpaid as I awaited a visit from my landlady. (note: in Taiwan individual apartments within an apartment building are usually owned by different people so the owner of mine does not actually live nearby.) The night of her visit finally arrived by the end of the month. One night after work, a run, and finally, a shower, I found myself leaving my bathroom wrapped in a towel just as my landlady, her sister, and one of the security guards were frantically making their way into my apartment. Umm, okay, mind if I put on a bit of clothes? They appeared to be as surprised and flustered to see me as I was to see them, for you see, I had apparently moved. In their defense, they had knocked and rang the bell several times before resorting to having a guard let them in, but being that I was in the shower, the commotion was drowned out. Anyway, it was all news to me that I no longer lived here, but someone got the idea in their head that I had moved out, perhaps as long as a month ago, and alerted my landlady that I no longer lived here. She, in turn, was confused as to why I'd leave without saying anything or trying to re-claim my security deposit and skip out on paying the rent.

The notion that I had left was totally ridiculous! As a friend pointed out, at least several times a week friends stop by my apartment, friends who must pass by the gate guard before getting into the compound. These are friends who come often and are recognized by the guards as friends of mine and considering they didn't stop frequenting my apartment since the time I supposedly "moved," why the heck did the guards think they were still coming here and why did they keep letting them in if they didn't think I lived here any longer?

Secondly, if the landlady was so panicked, she could have tried calling me. Granted, I'm not home much so reaching me via land line isn't always easy. And as for calling my cell, well, there had been only one call from her and it was on the same night that she came by. I had missed the call and hadn't seen it until after she left. Furthermore, she has my work phone number and once had to reach me there, so if all else failed and she truly thought I moved, she could have called my school to verify.

Finally, if the shoe rack with at least a dozen pairs of shoes outside my front door wasn't a give away that someone just might still be inhabiting the place, then I don't know what would be. Why would I move and leave most of my shoes behind?

So, obviously it became apparent rather quickly that I very much still live here. Clothed and with guard bill in hand, I joined in the process of trying to sort out the mess. Luckily for me, I'm blessed with a very kind and reasonable landlady. We proceeded to the guard station to try to figure out why the blunder occurred and also to find out the reason for the guard fee discount. It turns out the discount was because I had moved out. A half price fee is passed on to the owner of the apt. while it remains empty, so for over a month, despite my passing in and out of the building daily, someone came to the conclusion that I had moved out. Despite the fact that we've maintained a good rapport, now that the idea was planted, my landlady became worried that I may just one day up and move out without warning. It took a bit of convincing to ease her mind. By the end of the night, rent was paid, full guard fee paid, rounds of apologies made, and everything cleared up, or so I thought . . .

Not more than a few days later, I received my new guard bill for April. This time instead of being surprised by a discount, I was surprised by an additional fee of about $24US! Now what?! A few days later a friend stopped by and serving as my translator, we made our way to the guard station to get things straightened out. Now I was being charged an additional fee for the cleaning out of my parking space since I had moved! All this after establishing the fact that I indeed did NOT move. Furthermore, on the bill, I was being charged full price for the guard fee, further indicating I had not moved, yet on the same bill, I was being charged a cleaning fee because I moved. Next, how/why am I being charged a cleaning fee for a parking space that I never had/used? And finally, what exactly is done to "clean out" a parking space, especially, what could possibly be done to warrant a $24 cleaning charge? It's a parking garage! Except for some occasional sweeping, there's nothing ever done to "clean" the place. The charge was naturally dropped and the guard we dealt with, who is the most senior of the lot, was mad that such mistakes were being made and was both reasonable and apologetic.

In summary, despite what some may have you to believe, I have not moved.