Thursday, September 13, 2007

this morning i was attacked by a rabid raccoon . . . and then i woke up.

for the past few weeks i've not been sleeping well. i've been getting enough sleep, but not quality sleep and not at night but during some pocket of the morning. i realized today that with the kinds of dreams i've been having lately, it's no wonder i've been having a difficult time coaxing myself to sleep. there's no telling what i'll be waking up from next. each night seems to be in competition with the preceding to produce the most ridiculous, outlandish, or distressing dream, and for some of them, it actually takes awhile after waking to convince myself that it was indeed all invented in a dream and not a dream about something that actually happened.


the last day of my 2 week summer vacation was a sunday. i awoke from an afternoon nap that followed a busy morning, and went out for a walk to buy some bread. along the way, i thought about how vacation was coming to an end and tomorrow would mean a return to work. i also reflected on how i spent my vacation, mainly my trip to ecuador with friends becky and rick. we had had a great 2 weeks there and i wish we could have stayed longer. this continued for over a half hour until suddenly, like a glass falling to the floor and shattering into a hundred pieces, the reality broke over me that i had spent my entire vacation in taiwan. in fact, i've never even traveled to south america. yet how could i have so many vivid memories of the trip? how is it that the events of an afternoon nap had me convinced for nearly an hour afterwards that they actually occurred?

more than just a pleasant dream that i'd like to believe actually happened, my dreams lately have been accompanied with an element that makes them seem so convincingly real that they've kept me on my toes the past few months as though tip-toeing through a minefield of make believe and reality. with autumn's approach, i'm looking forward hopeful for a new phase with nights once again filled with sleep, lovely, restful, sleep.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I was reading this entry quickly -- too quickly, apparently, because I read the Ecuador trip part and thought, "WHAT?! Becky, Rick, and Kara excluded me AGAIN!!" I was in the That's-IT-I'm-not-talking-to-them-anymore mode when I read the realization of a dream part and thought, "Oh. Well that's okay."

Kara said...

yes, that's right. actually, we did go to ecuador without you this summer. i had to write that the trip was a "dream" so as not to hurt your feelings . . . again.